So, 4 months ago I updated my blog with the latest and greatest happenings in the Jenkins' household and was thinking to myself today that I have not updated in a while. So....while I had some downtime- which does not occur often- I thought I would update. Not that there will be anyone to read, but for some reason it makes me feel better to write sometimes....
The last time I wrote, we had just had the flood of 2012.....since then, we managed, with much difficulty and challenge, to get the repairs completed and everything restored and back in working condition. It was not easy to have no use of the kitchen for over a month, no furniture downstairs, and everything in general disarray, but I kept thinking to myself someone always has it worse. On the positive side of things, not only were the floors repaired, but we were able to replace all of the carpet downstairs with beautiful, South American Elm hardwoods, and the upstairs bathrooms with brand new tile. We had all of our trim repainted, the ceilings replaced, and a host of other household improvements we would have otherwise not been able to do had it not been for the flood. So as I was pondering this in one of my more pensive moods, I came to the conclusion that eventhough in our lives we often experience a "flood" of sorts with all the curve balls life throws at us, when all is said and done and you come through it, often times you gained more than you lost and can look back at the inconveniences and mishaps with appreciation for the blessings in disguise.
I have been trying to focus on this thought since we are once again going through some turmoil with our job situations....like everyone else is, right? I know I should be thankful that I even have a job and am doing something I love (this is a point I have to remind myself of daily because truly I am blessed to have both) but sometimes it is unnerving to know that I am really unable to settle things down because I never know where we will have to move next. This may seem like a trivial point, and to most I am sure it is....I don't know how military families survive, but for some reason this time it really has me ruffled. Perhaps it's the fact that we just moved here a little less than 2 years ago, or that this is the third school I have been at in 7 years, or that the twins are getting ready to start Kindergarten next year and I have no idea where they are going to go, or possibly that I have no idea what's going to happen next....whatever the reason, it has me stressing. Which, for those who know me, doesn't happen that often. I am usually pretty easy going, and can adapt in a positive way to most situations. Maybe it's my age, or the fact that I had certain ideas in my head as to how this would all work, or perhaps it's the fact that in general, I am a planner who likes to have everything laid out in advance so I know what to expect....I don't handle the unexpected too well. Whatever the reason, I am just ruffled by the unknown.....
As I was contemplating the heart of the matter, I came to the conclusion that trust is not something that comes naturally to me....I don't know why, but it doesn't. It is generally very difficult for me to rely on other people or the unknown when it comes to me, my life, and what goes on....I didn't have a particularly traumatic childhood, rather a very happy one for the most part. We didn't move around a lot although, we did move when I was in 8th grade, so it begs the question...why is this so difficult for me? Why do I struggle with not being able to control the situation? After much pondering, I concluded often times, trials are allowed to happen or things are placed in our paths that are difficult to deal with and/or handle so that we will learn and grow. Life is not easy, but after every storm, there is a rainbow to serve as a reminder that the storm is over and this too shall pass.
No comments:
Post a Comment